Don't Care

Ham it up Chuck! In fact, I don't care so much I'm thinking of FedEx'ing you a pulled pork sandwich with the cash I've got in my wallet. Ah, heck, I'll just send you a cashier's check for what's left in my checking account and let you name my firstborn child. In fact, you can even date my daughter when she comes of age, have the keys to my car, and stay at my house on weekends. But wait, there's more. I'll even throw in my free will, and if you act now, you can have my soul. Operators are standing by. So here's a quarter, Chuck. Call someone who cares.